Entry #24

My shitty Kickstarter about shitting

2015-01-13 02:02:34 by DeuceNine
Updated

893976_142113213032_1.jpg

The average person can waste up to 2.7 days a year just sitting on the toilet. ShitBags will revolutionize the way we poo, gaining all that lost time back. Just simply strap it on and you cango on the go!

Installing the ShitBag in 4 easy steps

893976_142113217443_3.gif

Step 1. Place one loop of the ShitBag on your lower back.

Step 2. Secure loop with the adhesive strip.

Step 3. Stretch the bag in between your legs, looping the other loop around your erection, securing it.

Step 4. Pants.

Now instead of having to hunt down a bathroom, you can do your business anytime, anywhere. A properly installed ShitBag should look something like this:

893976_142113221452_5.gif

What if I'm a girl?

This is not a product for girls because girls don't poop. If you are a girl and you do poop, simply sprout your erection because you are actually a man.

893976_142113237173_7.gif

 

I know the average Newgrounds user. Not only do you want this, you NEED this. It's a medical requirement these days. THANKS OBAMACARE. See more on our real KICKSTARTER PAGE.


Comments

You must be logged in to comment on this post.


Gibb50Gibb50

2015-01-13 02:51:29

What happens if you lose the erection and the excrement falls out of the bag?

DeuceNine responds:

Don't lose your erection! It's that simple.


PechenegPecheneg

2015-01-13 03:15:37

Oh shit... shit bag!


ZornuzkullZornuzkull

2015-01-13 05:04:49

How did I live without one...


RagingWarlockRagingWarlock

2015-01-13 06:39:01

Genius idea! I must donate to this on kickstarter...


DoomroarDoomroar

2015-01-13 07:01:53

A cheap as hell wannabee diaper! this will solve all the problems of humanity.

Also for how long do i need to maintain my erection? they say that after more than 4 hours your dick may start getting gangrene... i don't know if this wonderful invention is worth risking my penis.

DeuceNine responds:

Yeah, I was trying to save humanity, but I guess Kickstarter felt we aren't ready for progress.

If you're standing for more than 4 hours, you're overdue to lay down a bit. And when you're laying down, you don't need an erection to keep the bag in place.


ZenithQuinnZenithQuinn

2015-01-13 07:11:04

This is amazing.


freakworld10freakworld10

2015-01-13 09:08:34

Better than wallets.

DeuceNine responds:

Yeah, turds barely fit in most wallets.


TomFulpTomFulp

2015-01-13 10:58:17

I love that this actually made it through approval. Wonder if the suspended page will stick around long-term? I would have funded that shit...bag.

DeuceNine responds:

It just goes to show that anything can really make it though, just as long as you take the time to put in all your bank information. I suppose a bag that you can shit in kinda pushed them to do something. I just wish they sent me a message explaining why it was suspended. Would have loved to read that.

Hopefully it stays up on the internet forever, frozen like that.


CalebJordan360CalebJordan360

2015-01-13 11:05:29

XDD I love how he actually models the Shit Bag. Amazing lmao

DeuceNine responds:

:O ........ ;)


ZornuzkullZornuzkull

2015-01-13 11:41:15

What they suspended it?...
I just found my credit card...dammit...:(

DeuceNine responds:

It's like they straight up slapped candy from a baby's hand. You being the baby and a bag that you can shit in being the candy. :(


RBRB

2015-01-13 12:37:04

28 people actually donated to it!
AHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHA
This is literally the best joke ever. Following you.


SimplyRobotSimplyRobot

2015-01-13 14:26:52

Aww. Suspended.


ZornuzkullZornuzkull

2015-01-13 16:00:13

I'm mortified!!!...
Ahhh well back to shitting behind the sofa and blaming it on the dog I guess...:(


dylandylan

2015-01-13 16:55:12

I've just moved to Burbank this past weekend, and I would love the opportunity to take on an internship with you and your startup company. I've only been to one store so far, but I nabbed like forty bags. I've attached my resume and look forward to talking with you about any opportunities soon.


PegasuPegasu

2015-01-13 16:58:06

holy shit I spent the last 2 hours checking all of your work, it is marvelous, your storyboarding animating and shit...but MAH MAN! I think you should start focusing on this product designinging thing! congratulations


TaureactorTaureactor

2015-01-13 23:31:43

Hahaha "If you can hold the bag for longer than 4 hours, call a doctor." This is the best kickstarter page xD


HipnikDragomirHipnikDragomir

2015-01-14 00:19:34

Well.


BillPremoBillPremo

2015-01-14 02:58:48

There's always indiegogo.


jessejayjonesjessejayjones

2015-01-14 14:02:25

This is so fucking funny! I would love to see more of your excellent satire, this is gold!


tonyfamoustonyfamous

2015-01-14 23:54:10

I've used this and it's actually a great product. The only problem I have is when I lose my erection and the shit rolls out the bag and down my pants. Nothing against the product though. It's great and I recommend it and I'm working out my own solution, which is basically maintaining longer lasting erections.


LiLgLiLg

2015-01-15 00:20:26

Potato salad gets through but this doesn't?! What gives?


WhirlguyWhirlguy

2015-01-15 13:15:44

Hahaha this is glorious!


DjjanerDjjaner

2015-01-16 18:23:56

excellect idea.. (LOL) :D :D


deathinkdeathink

2015-07-12 18:55:00

Dude, haha. This is the best KS I have ever seen!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


LuigiBoy890LuigiBoy890

2015-11-15 20:12:24

I'll buy one of those.